The Most Annoying Email Subject Lines…EVER!!!

The Most Annoying Email Subject Lines...EVER!Right, I’ve decided that I am going to start this post as an ongoing list of the most annoying, cheeky and downright offensive subject lines that enter our email inbox each day.

Now of course, there’s nothing wrong with trying to get the best open rates possible, and as long as your subject line is funny, or maybe related to the subject of the email, or anything else for that matter, as long as it’s not flat out insulting or misleading.

So you know the type of thing I’m talking about don’t you? The subject line that has been created not with you in mind, but with the open rate instead.

In case anybody thinks that the only point is to get somebody to open your email, and therefore these subject lines are worth it, I’d say that the point of the email is to get people to read your email and click through to where you want them to go. Being an idiot with subject lines like these, will make people distrust you and stop reading altogether.

This is an open post and I’ll be adding to this whenever I find a new, unbelievably rotten subject line in my inbox.

So here goes:


The Most Annoying Subject Lines…EVER!!!

Subject: Thank you

What??? I know it’s meant to make you think…”Ooohh, I wonder what they’re thanking me about? I’d better open it…” but really, give us some respect will you?…PLEASE!

Subject: I’m Dying

I’ve had this a couple of times now, and quite frankly I find it both sick and offensive. On each occasion, the person backed up the subject line by adding some lame story in the email itself. It was either, “…to tell you about this.” Ugh, awful. Or, equally as bad, “It’s true, my laptop is dying on me with the amount of emails I’ve been receiving about this product”. Again, ugh! A quick note to the idiots that use this one, It’s not big, it’s not clever, and you only make yourself look like an idiot to the person reading.

Subject: I’m not going to email you anymore…

Then when you open up it says…”about this great offer”. I mean, REALLY! Surely people can’t get sucked in by this garbage.

Subject: Useless Product” is live, go go go…

This one has been getting on my nerves for years. Thankfully, it seemed to disappear for a while. However, I’ve noticed that it’s now rearing it’s ugly head again, as a new generation of online marketers get the chance to be offended by this ridiculously bad subject line. I mean…go go go…REALLY? If you get an email with this subject line, ask yourself if the marketer sending it had your best interests in mind when hitting send. I doubt it very much. Sometimes I’ve seen “hurry, hurry, hurry as well, equally as awful.

Subject: Do Not Buy “Useless Product”…

Of course, when you open up, you find out that you shouldn’t buy it…until you’ve seen the “amazing/unbelievable/never before seen” bonus that this particular marketer is offering for buying through their link. It’s misleading, it’s patronizing and it shows that you’re nothing more than a statistic in the open rates, instead of a real person.


I’ll keep adding these as I find them, feel free to add yours below.

Olly’s Tip

Olly's TipOne quick point, if you are going to add more of these by commenting, make sure you keep the name of the person out of it. It would be better to keep this as a post on useless subject lines, rather than a name calling exercise. Thank you. 🙂



Video Sales Letters And Extinct Birds

Okay, Quick Rant Time

The Olly Aha MomentToday it’s all about video sales letters.

I’ve no doubt that you’re the same as me. Most days, I set aside around 30 minutes in the morning to “catch up” with what’s been going on as I’ve slept. I’ll check all the usual sites, Facebook, twitter and of course, my email (how old skool is that?).

I’m sure, like me, you’re on a few marketers email lists. As always, there are good email marketers and bad email marketers (that’s a whole post on it’s own). The point of this post though is, what’s the deal with the video sales pages?

I remember a couple of years back, everybody started doing video sales pages because they were “cool”. A few of the bigger gurus reported that they had noticed a big percentage increase in conversions when they used them, and everybody thought “super cool”. Then they advised that they received even higher conversions when you had no timer bar, just a video that was set to autostart, and everybody thought “mega cool”.

So fast forward to now. It seems that the vast majority of people are still running their business from that advice that was given all that time ago. The reason I say “all that time ago”, is because that since then, nearly all the big launches have been accompanied with a video sales page, that we’re supposed to watch all the way through, before we finally succumb to their marketing powers and buy whatever it is they’re selling.

Here’s My Take On This

I don’t, and neither do you, need to hear about another marketer’s life struggles up to this point, and how he or she overcame adversity to become a success when they found out this “secret sauce”…blah, blah, blah…

Whatever happened to WIIFM? (What’s in it for me?) How many people Really have 20 minutes to spare to listen to this garbage anymore? Times change quickly in this internet world, and the long video sales page is ready to go the way of the dodo.

There’s no harm in having a quick video as an overview, a kind of headline introduction to your product, but the days of 20 minute videos have surely gone. In fact, I remember one that lasted 56 minutes…56 MINUTES! Give me a break!

Olly's Tip

Olly’s Tip

So, I believe the way to go forward with video on sales pages is this:

1) Remember that most people simply want results in the fastest way possible, so get to the point!

2) Nobody really cares about your back story when they first arrive on a page. As time goes on and your relationship builds, that’s different. But on the first meeting, that’s bad form. If I met you for the first time and said, “Hi, I’m Olly. You wouldn’t believe the struggles I’ve gone through to get to this point”. You’d rightly think I was a weirdo and walk away.

3) If you’re not going through a pre-sell phase and are therefore talking to cold (first time visitors) traffic, the most you should do in your video is give a warm welcome and a quick overview of what you have. That’s it!

Agree or disagree? Let me know by commenting below and I’ll speak to you soon.

Olly 🙂



Searching For A Shortcut

Searching For A Shortcut

One of the things that I made the mistake of doing when I first started out, was trying to find a shortcut for everything. Here’s the thing, if I had only realized then what I know now, I would have saved myself so much time and effort.

For example, when I realized that creating content was an absolute must if you were to succeed online, I set about trying to find a way of either automating the process, or certainly making it a lot easier. I thought to myself “Surely, there must be some way to fast track the process”.

I rushed out and got myself one of these pieces of software that helps you to write articles. The way it worked, was it would go and search the Internet for other articles and blog posts relating to the subject, and then it would collate all this information together for you, and all you had to do was rewrite in your own style.

To be honest, it took me longer to actually figure out how to use the software, than if I had just gotten on with it and written normally. If I’d have come to my senses and done this, I would have created a whole bunch of content, instead of trying to find a sneaky shortcut.

However, I struggled away with this software and kept on using it. I then decided to find out how long it took me to actually write a decent article, one that I was happy to submit to the article directories. The result? Most of the time, it took me roughly 30 minutes.


The Olly Aha MomentThe Olly Aha Moment

Then I tested myself just putting my fingers on to the keyboard and typing, in other words doing it the old-fashioned way. Low and behold, I could usually create an article of similar size and quality…in under 20 minutes!

The only thing I had to do was a bit of research first on my own, rather than going through the software. The research process usually took me a super lengthy 2-3 minutes.…as if. 🙂

What’s that old saying?…If you keep doing the same thing, you’ll keep getting the same results and it’s a sign of insanity. Well, after I found this out, guess what I did? Yes, that’s right! I kept on using software! Because I had been told that it made my life easier, I believed it.

And instead of just using my own writing talents, and honing my skills, I kept on with the software until common sense eventually kicked in and I realised that I would be far better off simply getting on and writing the content, rather than relying on a piece of software.

Here’s the thing. The more I actually wrote the content myself, the better I got. It got to the point where I could write a good sized, quality article of about 400 to 500 words, in a subject that I had no idea about, all in around 15 minutes!


Olly's TipOlly’s Tip

So the moral of the story is? Sometimes, in fact make that nearly all of the time, you are much better using your own skills and talents to create your content than to rely on a bit of software, that lets face it, even though it is handy and useful, it doesn’t really create content from the heart.

In other words the content it creates is faceless! It doesn’t include any bit of you, your character, and this is how people get to know you after all.

So if you are using some kind of shortcut software for any creative part of your business, unless it is a technical part of your business, I would say, why not try to be creative yourself? And then you never know, you may end up not only saving yourself time, but also creating better content at the same time.

Thanks for reading as always, and let me and everyone else know what your thoughts are below. Speak soon.

Olly 🙂


Well, isn’t this all fancy?

Hello there

So, I thought that after all this time I’d go all posh on you and get myself one of these fashionable blog things. It even comes along with a proper domain name, it all seems very nifty I must say. 🙂

This is where you’ll find me from now on then, It has nice ring to it don’t you agree? 🙂